Interesting Fragment A: Here is my favorite clip on the internet right now. It makes me laugh out loud.
Sweedish Fish Worship: If I were going to create a religion, I would not muck around with worshipping aliens like some (crazy) stars we might think of like, oh, I don't know TOM CRAZY CRUISE.
Oh, no. If I were going to create a religion, it would center around worshipping the Sweedish Fish. And the only appropriate way to worship it would be to eat them in large quantities.
I love Sweedish Fish. I sneak them into the movie theater on a regular basis. They make a long drive that much more fun. How can you not be excited to be driving on a nice, sunny day while listening to Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell and eating Sweedish Fish? You can't not be excited when the planets line up to create such a perfect set of circumstances as that. Quit lying.
Half a Bottle of Brandy: So far, the highlight of my visit came in the first 15 minutes after I walked in the door. Dad asked me if I wanted some Brandy and took down half a bottle of Christian Brothers Brandy from the shelf in the kitchen.
Now, my family is a bunch of teetotalers (yours truly excluded although I plan to one day completely abandon the stuff as well) (most of my family had their "roaring 20s" and then settled down into the teetotaling bunch they are now, so no, I don't think that statement makes me sound like an alcoholic). So, it is completely uncharacteristic for my dad to a) even mention alcohol (I think he feels awkward now that we all know he spent some time enjoying beer in his younger days) or b) allow it to sit in plain view on his kitchen shelf (excluding the time my grandpa tried to put raisins in gin for some "medical" reason I no longer remember or the time my little sister brought back the bottles of "apple jack" that Grandma, Grandpa and Dad had created while trying to bottle apple juice) (don't ask). And he would never, ever seriously offer me brandy.
It was Grandpa's Brandy. He had it on a shelf in the back of the closet. Dad revealed that Grandpa used to mix up "What he called a hot toddy" on particularly cold nights "once in a great, great while." Dad said that Grandma wanted Dad to have it because he'd "get a kick out of it."
I get a kick out of it, too. Not because I have my own half bottle of rum hidden in my filing cabinet (which I do) but because I think it's sweet and funny all at the same time. Some of you know that I interviewed my grandpa last summer and tape recorded those interviews. I wanted to know more about the farm, but I found out a lot about my grandpa. One of the things I found out was that on hot days after haying, he used to come in for a beer, but he quit when us kids started asking about it because he thought, "Those little girls don't need to see that" (probably not an exact quote but as close as I can get without sifting through three cassetts and bawling my eyes out, so it'll have to do).
I don't know what it is that I find so poignant about this. Maybe it's just that I feel like I'm like him, and I feel like even if he knew about the rum, he'd probably laugh a bit. I'm not sure. It makes me laugh and cry all at the same time. All this from half a bottle of brandy.
Posted by LoWriter at April 14, 2006 03:28 PMWhile your idea for a Church of Swedish Fish Goodness (COSFG...pronounced like "coss-fug" if you say it really fast) sounds splendid & delicious, i personally think i'd have a hard time worshipping something that i eat. I mean, if something is truly better & more powerful than i, wouldn't it be able to eat me??? However i do applaud anyone who sneaks them into movie theaters. Or anyone who uses their magical powers at BINGO.
You know what i mean.
OOOOOOhhh, 69!
but wait, the swedish fish nourishes us and keeps us alive!!! it's all powerful!!!
Posted by: dr gonzo at April 17, 2006 10:23 AMLove the swedish fish. That reminds me, I need to go candy shopping today since it is the day after easter. Peeps and other confections should be half price.
Why do you think that you'll be a teetotaler later too? Why has your family gone that way? I had never heard that term before today and had to look it up in the wikipedia.
Posted by: jeff at April 17, 2006 11:11 AMWell, I should say my immediate family (grandparents and parents) have gone that way. The rest of my family consists of raging alcoholics. So, I'm pretty sure that's why my immediate family is made up of teetotalers. They've seen alcohol destroy too many people in our family. So, that's why I am pretty sure that one day I will completely give it up, too. Frankly, I have to be really really careful about it because it can start to get out of control very easily. Sorry for not posting a wikipedia link in the blog. Now that I think of it, I don't really ever hear anyone else using it. Sorry!
And I do use the magical powers of sweedish fish at BINGO.
Posted by: Lo at April 17, 2006 05:52 PMMy mom always uses the term teetolars, so I guess I am used to it too.
But I thought your article was really sweet! I hope you enjoyed your hot toddy! I have heard they aren't the best :-)
Posted by: 10lees at April 18, 2006 09:57 AMWe did not actually have hot toddies. My dad was joking when he offered me the brandy.
I bet they wouldn't taste very good, though.
Posted by: Lo at April 18, 2006 10:02 AMThe first time I came across the word "teetotalers" was on the first page of "The Voyage of the Dawn Treader" and I could tell from the context that it wasn't something to aspire to. Thus, you can blame my drinking on the insidious influence of C.S. Lewis!
Posted by: Jeremy K at April 18, 2006 03:09 PMwell CS did have a pint of guiness (or some such beer) every morning - he was british and not much of a teetotaler :-)
Posted by: 10lees at April 19, 2006 09:38 PMI blame C.S. Lewis for everything. It's all his fault.
Posted by: Lo at April 20, 2006 07:48 AMI blame Tom Cruise.
Also known as PSYCHO.
I used to like Tom Cruise, but then he started talking.
Posted by: Lo at April 20, 2006 06:38 PMAnd breeding.
On the radio this morning David Spade was imitating Tom Cruise as he announced the birth of his child...
"And i'm really excited to welcome my new moon to the...I mean daughter. Welcome my new daughter. Haha, what did i say?"
Sadly i cannot convey the fun tone of voice by typing. But it was hilarious!
Did he actually say that or was someone just predicting that he probably would? Because I'd beleive it of him.
I hate Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes by association. And the name they gave their poor kid. Suri. People are going to say "Soo-eee" at her all the time. Hippies.
Posted by: Lo at April 21, 2006 09:01 AMI don't think he actually said that. But it still made me laugh a lot.
I personally feel that Dawson's Creek counted against Katie Holmes to begin with, and now this Tom Cruise mess doens't help.
Posted by: mel at April 21, 2006 12:21 PMWho actually picked out the name "Suri"; was it the Cruise/Holmes Axis of Insanity, or their collected marketing/p.r. people?
I've heard "Suri" means "princess" in Hebrew. I'm not 100% certain about that, but I do know that it means "pickpocket" in Japanese. Congrats to Tom and Katie.
Posted by: Thom at April 21, 2006 02:32 PMha!! That is hilarious!! The crazies gave birth to their very own little criminal. How fantastic for everyone.
Posted by: mel at April 21, 2006 02:43 PMWell, since Sarah also means Hebrew princess, I would assume that probably Suri is the Hebrew version of Sarah (although I was pretty sure that "Sari" was Hebrew for Sarah and princess, but maybe not... that would be even better--if they misspelled it). If they were Hebrew, this might be kind of cool. Since they are crazy and may as well believe in flying spagetti monsterism (I'll find the link to this later but I'm sure if you google it, you will find it), it is not actually cool at all.
I do enjoy the fact that if she goes to Japan, she will have a lot of trouble because she will have to call herself a pickpocket. Ha! Poor kid. It's not her fault her parents are FREAKS.
Posted by: Lo at April 21, 2006 05:10 PMOh, and Lo, I love the video link; Berlitz is an actual English Language tutoring company, they've got at least one branch in Nagoya. The sad thing is, they've got a much better reputation than Nova, my current company. Oh sick, sick irony.
They have another video out too; I'll try to find a link...
Posted by: Thom at April 22, 2006 10:52 AMThom, you have no idea how excited I am that you have real player and can watch it.
I just thought it was hillarious. Me and one of my friends say it to each other when we're feeling blue. It's great fun.
Posted by: Lo at April 24, 2006 06:20 PM