So, as we're all well aware by now, Cingular bought AT&T and has since been "raising the bar" and offering "more bars in more places." Here's what I think that really means:
1) We're raising the bar because it's easier to rob somebody if you're threatening them with a blunt object.
2) We're raising the bar... along with our prices, our uselessness, and our call center wait time.
3) We're raising the bar because that way it's easier to screw you over with it.
4) We're raising the bar. Assume the position.
5) More bars in more places, but only if you're traveling on a major highway.
6) We're raising the bar so that we can drop it on you.
7) We're raising the bar so that we can use it as a road block in order to avoid dealing with you at all costs.
8) More bars in more places... none of them pleasant.
9) We're raising the bar so that you can't reach it anymore.
10) More bars in more places... kind of like prison, only we don't feed you.
11) More bars in more places, with the exception of your living room, half of your kitchen, the middle of your bedroom (you can always huddle in a corner), within 3 feet of any running electrical device (including the fridge and the stove), in any place where you actually feel the need to have a phone for safety reasons, and anytime the phone is in use. Feel free to hang out your window, although this may not help.
12) We're raising the bar and there's nothing you can do to stop us. Mwaaa haaa haa haaaaa.
Posted by LoWriter at June 2, 2005 11:07 AM13) We're raising the bar positively everywhere except for that one spot where your car broke down less than 2 miles from your house (yes, the same house where the phone works fine).
14) We're raising the bar... but not as high as the 3rd floor of school. You must cloister yourself underground -- in the basement near the creepy dishwasher guy in the cafeteria -- if you need to make a call.
Posted by: Mardou at June 2, 2005 05:47 PMI thought the whole thing was a disaster from the start. AT&T had a hard time grasping the second part of Customer Service as long as the first part existed (why they were losing customers at more than twice the rate of the others when porting was demanded, despite their failing to release phone numbers for a while), and Cingular couldn't keep the network up even in places where they did have signal (rollover was a reaction to this - if you think about it's basically automatically crediting you minutes for times you couldn't use your phone, reducing their customer service load and cost for all the people calling to get credit for outages. It has the side effect of helping people that have large swings in their usage, but that wasn't the primary reason). What funny is a lot of people predicted this, and true to form their customer service still sucks for most people (I've called twice to cancel evaluation plans, no arguements after I said the reason was coverage - obviously they've given up), and they've managed to not only take down the former Cingular network but also the former AT&T network nationwide several times for many hours each time. I like to just sit back and laugh at them. :)
Posted by: Jeremy at June 2, 2005 07:35 PMi've stuck with Verizon for about 6 years now, and i've been treated well, as long as i thoroughly check my bill every month. i go through stages where i have to call a CSR every month for a few months. but right now, i'm in a no-call position and enjoying it. i get my free phone soon too. yay for pictures! i guess, i have resigned to occasionally getting effed in the arse. chaffing.......
Posted by: Dr. Gonzo at June 3, 2005 10:57 AM